Practical Desk Calendars

Actually useful. Still funny. The holy grail of workplace gifts. Find the perfect calendars for every profession.

Why Practical Calendars

For people who think 'what's the point' when they see a decorative gift. These are gifts that earn their desk real estate by being genuinely useful—while still having enough personality to not be boring. Function meets irreverence.

Regular calendars show you inspirational quotes about believing in yourself. Our calendars show you the truth: that every day is another opportunity to question your life choices. A daily tear-off page of dark humor gives you something to look forward to each morning besides coffee. It's like a daily affirmation, but honest.

What You Get

  • +365 daily pages of workplace-appropriate(ish) dark humor
  • +Sturdy cardboard backing that stands on its own
  • +Perforated pages for satisfying daily tears
  • +Compact desktop size that fits any workspace

Best For

  • The coworker who complains about 'dust collectors'
  • Minimalists who only keep things that serve a purpose
  • Anyone whose desk is suspiciously organized
  • Desks that need daily entertainment
  • People who've given up on inspirational quotes
  • Teams who share a dark sense of humor

Get First Access

Next year's calendar is in the works. Get on the list to be first in line for 365 days of relatable misery. Be first to see new practical designs.

Calendars in Other Styles

Frequently Asked Questions

What year is the calendar for?
Current year calendars ship immediately. We drop next year's edition in Q4. Sign up for the email list to get notified.
Is every day different?
Yes. 365 unique pages of dark humor, sarcastic observations, and workplace truths. No repeats, just like your recurring sense of dread.
How big is it?
Standard desk calendar size (4.5" x 4.5") with a sturdy backing. Fits on any desk without taking over your already limited workspace.
Are these appropriate for a shared workspace?
Most days are office-safe. Some might raise eyebrows. But if your coworkers don't appreciate dark humor, are they really your people?