Dark Humor Gifts Desk Plates for Butchers

Because sometimes you have to laugh to keep from screaming into the void. The perfect dark humor gifts desk plates for the butchers in your life.

Why Dark Humor Gifts Desk Plates for Butchers

Butchery is skilled craft work in cold conditions. You're an artist with a knife and an educator for everyone's dinner.

Dark humor isn't pessimism—it's advanced optimism. It's acknowledging that work can be soul-crushing while choosing to laugh about it anyway. These gifts are for the realists, the survivors, and anyone who's ever stared into the abyss of their inbox and felt it stare back. If gallows humor is your love language, welcome home.

The Vibe

  • I survived another meeting that should've been an email
  • My soul left my body in Q3
  • Dead inside but still clocking in
  • This job is temporary. My resentment is forever.

What You Get

  • +Premium acrylic that looks expensive but costs less than your therapy
  • +Sleek design that fits any desk setup from corner office to closet office
  • +Easy-clean surface because coffee accidents happen
  • +Subtle enough to survive management walkthroughs

Perfect For

  • Healthcare workers who've seen some things
  • Anyone in their third career pivot
  • Desks that need more personality than a corporate-issued pencil cup
  • Home offices where you make the rules
  • Aprons with personality
  • Water bottles at work

Get First Access

Butcher stickers in development. Join the list.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Is dark humor the same as being negative?
No, it's being realistic with a sense of humor. Negative people complain. We make merch.
Will HR have a problem with these gifts?
HR has problems with everything. That's kind of their whole deal. But these are designed to be just vague enough.
What are the desk plates made of?
Premium acrylic with a high-quality print. They look professional enough to keep, but funny enough to actually want on your desk.
Are these about explaining cuts?
Some are. The ribeye vs NY strip conversation is eternal.