Raunchy Tote Bags for Sysadmins

HR's nightmare. Your work bestie's dream. Know your audience. The perfect raunchy tote bags for the sysadmins in your life.

Why Raunchy Tote Bags for Sysadmins

Sysadmin life is invisible when you're succeeding and blamed when anything fails. You're on-call for problems you didn't create. These stickers get the ops life.

Gifts that cross the line—intentionally. These are not for the break room fridge or the all-hands meeting. They're for private exchanges between people who share a very specific sense of humor and have already established that boundaries are optional. Adults only, consenting parties only, HR-free zones only.

Fair Warning

  • !Not suitable for professional gift exchanges
  • !Know your recipient VERY well before purchasing
  • !May contain adult language, themes, or imagery
  • !Could definitely get you talked to by management

What You Get

  • +Heavy-duty canvas that survives the commute and your career
  • +Reinforced straps for hauling all your work baggage (literal and emotional)
  • +Interior pocket for keys, phone, or emergency snacks
  • +Machine washable for when life gets messy

Perfect For

  • Daily commutes that need entertainment
  • Grocery runs after work because you're already out
  • Gym bags for stress relief sessions
  • Laptops with personality
  • Server room entertainment
  • Water bottles at the desk

Get First Access

Sysadmin stickers in development. Join the list.

Need Something More Work-Safe?

Check out our SFW tote bags for sysadmins.

Browse Office-Appropriate Tote Bags

Frequently Asked Questions

How big are the tote bags?
15" x 16" with a 4" gusset - fits a laptop, lunch, and the emotional weight of your responsibilities. Handles have an 11" drop for easy shoulder carrying.
What material are they?
Heavy-duty 12oz canvas. These aren't flimsy grocery store bags - they're built to carry your stuff through whatever your commute throws at you.
Are these about users?
Some reference the sysadmin-user dynamic. All in good fun.
Do you cover different specialties?
Linux, Windows, cloud, network - building collections.