Halloween Calendars for Butchers
The one day a year where 'creepy' is a feature, not a reason to call HR. The perfect calendars for the butchers in your life.
Why Calendars for Butchers
Butchery is skilled craft work in cold conditions. You're an artist with a knife and an educator for everyone's dinner.
Regular calendars show you inspirational quotes about believing in yourself. Our calendars show you the truth: that every day is another opportunity to question your life choices. A daily tear-off page of dark humor gives you something to look forward to each morning besides coffee. It's like a daily affirmation, but honest.
About Halloween Gifting
Spooky season at the office means costume contests nobody asked for and candy bowls that get raided by 10am. These gifts embrace the darkness year-round—perfect for the coworker whose soul left their body three quarters ago.
October
$15-30
What You Get
- +365 daily pages of workplace-appropriate(ish) dark humor
- +Sturdy cardboard backing that stands on its own
- +Perforated pages for satisfying daily tears
- +Compact desktop size that fits any workspace
Perfect For
- Aprons with personality
- Water bottles at work
- Tool storage
- Desks that need daily entertainment
- People who've given up on inspirational quotes
- Teams who share a dark sense of humor
Get First Access
Butcher stickers in development. Join the list.
Related Professions
Calendars for Butchers - Other Holidays
Frequently Asked Questions
- What year is the calendar for?
- Current year calendars ship immediately. We drop next year's edition in Q4. Sign up for the email list to get notified.
- Is every day different?
- Yes. 365 unique pages of dark humor, sarcastic observations, and workplace truths. No repeats, just like your recurring sense of dread.
- Are these about explaining cuts?
- Some are. The ribeye vs NY strip conversation is eternal.
- Do you cover different butcher types?
- Retail, wholesale, specialty - building content.