Retirement Gifts Calendars for Window Cleaners
They survived. They're free. They deserve better than a generic card. The perfect calendars for the window cleaners in your life.
Why Calendars for Window Cleaners
Window cleaning is precision work with serious heights. You see views others only dream of while making glass disappear.
Regular calendars show you inspirational quotes about believing in yourself. Our calendars show you the truth: that every day is another opportunity to question your life choices. A daily tear-off page of dark humor gives you something to look forward to each morning besides coffee. It's like a daily affirmation, but honest.
About Retirement Gifts
After decades of mandatory fun, terrible coffee, and pretending to care about synergy, your coworker has finally earned their escape. This isn't just a career milestone—it's a prison break. They've sat through thousands of meetings that could've been emails, smiled through countless reorganizations, and mastered the art of looking busy. A retirement gift should acknowledge the beautiful chaos they're leaving behind while celebrating the fact that they never have to set an alarm again.
What You Get
- +365 daily pages of workplace-appropriate(ish) dark humor
- +Sturdy cardboard backing that stands on its own
- +Perforated pages for satisfying daily tears
- +Compact desktop size that fits any workspace
Gift Ideas
- +A coffee mug that says 'I'm retired, your meeting is not my problem'
- +A countdown calendar they can dramatically throw away
- +A fake parking pass for 'Anywhere But Here'
- +A survival kit for their first Monday of freedom
- +A certificate of completion for Corporate America
Perfect For
- The coworker who's been counting down for years
- The boss who actually wasn't terrible
- Desks that need daily entertainment
- People who've given up on inspirational quotes
- Equipment bags with personality
- Water bottles on site
Get First Access
Window cleaner stickers in development. Join the list.
Related Professions
Other Occasions for Window Cleaners
Frequently Asked Questions
- How much should I spend on a retirement gift?
- Depends on how much you liked them. Quick coffee chat coworker? $20-30. Actual work friend who kept you sane? $50+. Person whose retirement is the only reason you haven't quit? Priceless (but maybe $75).
- Is it weird to get a funny gift for someone's retirement?
- Only if they have no sense of humor. If they survived corporate life this long, they definitely have one. Skip the generic 'World's Best Retiree' mug and get something that actually makes them laugh.
- What year is the calendar for?
- Current year calendars ship immediately. We drop next year's edition in Q4. Sign up for the email list to get notified.
- Are these about heights?
- Some are. The view up there is something else.