Dark Humor Gifts Calendars for Painters

Because sometimes you have to laugh to keep from screaming into the void. The perfect dark humor gifts calendars for the painters in your life.

Why Dark Humor Gifts Calendars for Painters

Painting is precision work that looks easy until you try it. You create clean lines and handle customers who can't decide on colors.

Dark humor isn't pessimism—it's advanced optimism. It's acknowledging that work can be soul-crushing while choosing to laugh about it anyway. These gifts are for the realists, the survivors, and anyone who's ever stared into the abyss of their inbox and felt it stare back. If gallows humor is your love language, welcome home.

The Vibe

  • I survived another meeting that should've been an email
  • My soul left my body in Q3
  • Dead inside but still clocking in
  • This job is temporary. My resentment is forever.

What You Get

  • +365 daily pages of workplace-appropriate(ish) dark humor
  • +Sturdy cardboard backing that stands on its own
  • +Perforated pages for satisfying daily tears
  • +Compact desktop size that fits any workspace

Perfect For

  • Healthcare workers who've seen some things
  • Anyone in their third career pivot
  • Desks that need daily entertainment
  • People who've given up on inspirational quotes
  • Work clothes with personality
  • Water bottles on site

Get First Access

Painter stickers in development. Join the list.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Is dark humor the same as being negative?
No, it's being realistic with a sense of humor. Negative people complain. We make merch.
Will HR have a problem with these gifts?
HR has problems with everything. That's kind of their whole deal. But these are designed to be just vague enough.
What year is the calendar for?
Current year calendars ship immediately. We drop next year's edition in Q4. Sign up for the email list to get notified.
Are these about color changes?
Some are. The mid-job change gets mentioned.