Raunchy Mousepads for Dispatchers
HR's nightmare. Your work bestie's dream. Know your audience. The perfect raunchy mousepads for the dispatchers in your life.
Why Raunchy Mousepads for Dispatchers
Dispatch is the most stressful job no one sees. You hear everything but see nothing. Make life-or-death decisions with incomplete information. And rarely get the recognition you deserve.
Gifts that cross the line—intentionally. These are not for the break room fridge or the all-hands meeting. They're for private exchanges between people who share a very specific sense of humor and have already established that boundaries are optional. Adults only, consenting parties only, HR-free zones only.
Fair Warning
- !Not suitable for professional gift exchanges
- !Know your recipient VERY well before purchasing
- !May contain adult language, themes, or imagery
- !Could definitely get you talked to by management
What You Get
- +Smooth fabric surface for precision clicking through pointless emails
- +Non-slip rubber base that stays put during rage-clicking
- +Stitched edges that won't fray like your patience
- +Machine washable because desk snacks happen
Perfect For
- Desks that need a conversation starter (or stopper)
- Home offices where you control the vibe
- Cubicles that need more personality than beige walls provide
- Headset stations with style
- Water bottles that survive 12s
- Console area personalization
Get First Access
Dispatcher stickers coming soon. Join the list.
Related Professions
Need Something More Work-Safe?
Check out our SFW mousepads for dispatchers.
Browse Office-Appropriate MousepadsFrequently Asked Questions
- What size are the mousepads?
- Standard size (9.25" x 7.75") that fits any desk setup. Large enough to use, small enough to hide if the CEO does a walkthrough.
- Can I wash it?
- Yes. Machine washable on cold, air dry. Because between coffee spills and stress-eating at your desk, it's going to need it.
- Do you understand dispatch?
- Yes. We know you're not 'just answering phones.'
- Are these about difficult callers?
- Some are. The ones who call 911 for non-emergencies will be referenced.